Baltimore Evening Sun (15 December 1913): 6.

Annual appropriations for public libraries in various American cities:

Even including its income from the fund established by the Hon. Enoch Pratt, the Pratt Library receives but $92,300 a year. This is less than half the income of any general public library in any other city of Baltimore’s size. It is less than one-third the income of the Cleveland library. This year the Pratt asked the Board of Estimates for $68,300, which would have brought its total income for 1914 up to $118,300. But the Board of Estimates cut the appropriation down to $42,300, a reduction of $500 a week. How is the library ever to make progress in the face of such niggardly support? In particular, how is it ever to enlarge its present overcrowded headquarters on Mulberry street?

A DAILY THOUGHT. Indiscriminate almsgiving is an amiable but idiotic form of self-indulgence.—The Hon. F. A. Blossom.

Extract from a letter to the Hon. Dashing Harry, notifying him of his election to the membership in the Albany Burgesses Corps, an organization said to number King George V, Count Rene du Rochambeau and the Hon. Reed Smoot among its ornaments:

In extending this compliment, the highest honor within the gift of the Corps, the Command feels that they are honoring themselves in honoring in you a distinguished exemplar which distinguish the American people, and of that high type of American citizenship which has done so much to develop and uplift our wonderful country.

Naturally enough, the hon. gent. was vastly tickled by this sweet gabble about his uplifting talents, and so he ordered the Hot Towel to embalm the letter in print, and the Towel dutifully embalmed it, along with some soft, oily stuff about its receipt being “a great surprise” to his Honor, and a “gratifying” proof that he is “known for his activities outside of Baltimore.” But before he goes any further with his rejoicing, let me respectfully suggest that he take a good, long look down the gullet of this gift horse. In particular, let me suggest that he make inquiry whether or not an identical letter, or one substantially identical, has been received by any other Baltimorean. Let him but do so, and an even greater surprise will await him.

The Rev. Dr. W. W. Davis’ attack upon the thé dansant given at Doughoregan Manor yesterday was characteristically prudent, virtuous and in good taste. It is the plain duty of every such great and gifted matador of morality to flay vice whenever and wherever it rears its head. The Hon. Charles Carroll, it appears, has lived in Darkest Europe so long that he is ignorant of the first principles of chemically pure conduct in America. Let him understand clearly that the looseness of Babylon and Nineveh will not be tolerated in this vicinage. He must entertain his guests, not according to the dictates of his own lamentable gayety, but according to rules laid down by his moral bosses and betters. If he would be on the safe side, let him submit an advance program of his next party to the Rev. Dr. Davis, and so make sure that it is up to the mark. The Police Board of Baltimore has hitherto lent its cops to the Pentz Society. Let the Hon. Mr. Carroll beware lest it land a squad of them to the Lord’s Day Alliance.

The Hon. William H. Anderson takes half a page in the current American Issue to explain to the deacons that he doesn’t claim divine attributes, but merely divine backing. A quibble worthy of the palmy days of socialism. The important thing is that the hon. gent. puts the blame upon Heaven for all his lamentable chicaneries, including his celebrated attempt upon the virtue of the clergy. The objection to this shameless standing from under is not only that it is without Biblical or other sufficient warrant, but also that it is essentially ungentlemanly. A true gentleman does not dodge responsibility for his vices. When he is caught picking a pocket or kidnapping a suffragette, he does not try to put the blame on liquor, and when he is caught corrupting holy men he does not put the blame upon the angels.

Incidentally, the Hon. Mr. Anderson seems to labor under the impression that he disposed of my objections to his claim to divine afflatus so long ago as November 29. He even goes so far as to print a letter from an anonymous (and probably mythical) clergyman, congratulating him upon the slickness of his evasion. I quote a few sample strophes:

There is an indefinable quality about it like the soft glow of a perfct landscape, and yet it is definite enough to pierce any neutrality. I have often marvelled at your dexterity. * * *

So have the rest of us. Such dexterity, even if its super-natural character be questioned, is at least of extraordinary quality. It would be difficult, indeed, to imagine a man more nimble and limber than the Hon. Mr. Anderson. One may strap him to a mangenese steel hitching post, point a blunderbuss at his vitals, and pull the trigger while the muzzle is in actual contact with his Masonic watch-charm–and yet the odds will be 4 to 1 that he will jump in time. My advice to the triumphant Rum Demonists in that they bear this talent constantly in mind. How do they know that all the hon. gent’s. talk about a call to New York is anything more than a subterfuge, an ambush? Let them watch him from all sides! The hand is quicker than the eye!

Meanwhile, speaking for the Christian folk of this town, and with the knowledge and consent of a committee of clergymen representing all the principal denominations, I hereby enter a formal demurrer to the hon. gent’s theory that he has “divine backing.” (Ehue, what a vulgar phrase!) He has no more “divine backing” than the Hon. Charles J. Bonaparte, the Hon. David Belasco, the Rev. Dr. Kennet G. Murray, or any other such uplifter. His actual backers are assertively, and even distressingly human. I say this, not in criticism of them, but in praise. And in departing from the the revolting subject, I tilt a bucket of molasses over the hon. gent. himself. Say what you will about him, he always gives a darn good show.

Meanwhile, so my spies tell me, the ex-sheriffs are planning to jam a relief act through the Legislature in case the Court of Appeals goes against them. Anything to avoid losing the money!